Posted by Executive Matchmaker Romella Battle
She is making career strides but still seeking Mr. Right!
Featured by: Mona Lisa Vito, Professional Matchmaker & Relationship Coach
~Nicole is celebrating another birthday. A 31-year-old black woman, she’s already a prosecuting attorney. Personable and direct, Nicole isn’t the kind of woman you find standing by passively on the sidelines of life. But you would find her, for example, at a football game, cheering on the team. You’ve heard of a man’s man. She is the quintessential man’s woman: She appears to have it all. And, yet, she’s still single. As a Single Professional she has plenty of company and her parameters are pretty flexible. So why is she still single?
Q: Nicole, why do you believe you are still single?
A: “I look forward to being married.”It’s just not that easy. For starters, there are 1.8 million more black women than black men. So even if every black man in America married a black woman today, one out of 12 black women still wouldn’t make it down the aisle if they hoped to marry a black man.
Q: What is your biggest concern?
A: “I would be lying if I said I don’t have fleeting thoughts of, ‘OK, I am 31, my clock is ticking,”
Q: Nicole do you feel you need to set aside certain standards in order to make it down the aisle?
A: “I’ve dated unemployed men, men trying to find themselves, struggling artists, rich men, and poor men. I’m even open to dating outside my race.”
Q: Is there a difference between the standards you have for yourself and the standards you have for men?
A: “I kind of have certain standards that I hold myself to, and I don’t think I should have to settle on those for the sake of having somebody. I don’t have a certain criteria, however I used to, for example if you were not a certain height or age then it was a no go, but as I got older I wanted someone that we could see eye-to-eye.”
“In my past experience, I was at a restaurant and had a great conversation with a Caucasian man, she said. We were clicking and I am thinking at the end of the night he’s going to ask me for my number, because white men never ask for my number, and he said. ‘Great conversation, maybe I will see you around.’ And I was thinking, ‘What happened?’
Q: Do you feel like finding a good relationship is out of your control?
A:”The one thing that I can’t control is a man choosing to marry me,” Nicole said, and, so, I choose not to worry about it.”
Q: Has your prospective changed as you have gotten older?
A: “I am lonely, but having the faith I have and being the woman I am and waiting as long as I have, I can’t settle now. It’s not an option for me. So if I don’t find the perfect person for me, then I’ll just remain single.”
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