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Posts Tagged ‘single’

Listen to the Heart or Follow the Mind

Posted on: June 12th, 2013 by Executive Matchmaker Romella Battle

How many times do you hear, “follow your heart and not your mind?” it is one of the most common concepts when it comes to dating, relationships or love in general. The heart vs. the mind is one of the most difficult battles you may find within yourself and one of the most difficult of situations when it comes to love.

When it comes to the heart, one of the major drives or factors are from the emotional aspect. Emotions can be known to make or break a personal outlook of an important individual because it’s the expression of how you feel; rather good or bad, emotions tell it all. Some people can be more in tune with their feelings than others, making it very easy for them to use the heart when evaluating their feelings for someone. Though emotions are apart of the main drive of a person, they can also work against you at times. With feelings or emotions, the ability to make a person vulnerable or out of the usual comfort zone is not a hard concept to obtain which can make things difficult when it comes to a relationship or dating. Being vulnerable and in the unknown can lead a person to confusion, frustration with the idea of waiting on the next level or next step if any. This is when confusion may begin to set in and leads a person to look at the mind for advice or what to do next.

Certain things begin to shift once the object of the mind is placed in the picture. The mind itself is known to be more of the blunt and upfront aspect for decisions. As a shield and protector of the emotions, the mind will let a person know when enough is enough and could care less how much an individual may love a person or care for them. If the mind receives a glimpse or slight idea that you are not receiving the treatment it feels you deserves, there is no problem for the mind to shut out the emotional concept; once a mind is made up it can be difficult to change. Even as a protector, it can also play tricks, leading the person to believe in something that may not completely be what’s expected. This is why many people say expect the unexpected because at times when listening to the mind over thinking or not thinking thoroughly can occur.

As the idea of dating or being in a relationship approaches finding balance between the emotional point and the will of a strong mind is the best way to sort through the overall journey as a whole. In a relationship or in the object of love, these two strong accessories will battle at times but it’s up to you to discover which side you will listen to.

-C.Johmson

Progress: Moving to the Next Step

Posted on: June 8th, 2013 by Executive Matchmaker Romella Battle

Marriage is a serious vow and commitment made by a couple to spend the rest of their lives together. By taking part in this journey called marriage, the lives of the people around you can change just as much as your own. For some, the opinion about your significant other can hold serious weight.

What happens when the person you love and will be married to, is not to the liking of your close family members and friends? Do you stop loving them or do you move forward? A lot of people have difficulties in their marriage because different opinions from outside sources leak and intrude the establishment of the couple. This usually stems from not being able to let go of those who are close to you and holding in what they want or feel is best for you at a higher level than what you want for yourself. By partaking in this chain of reactions, it can be very difficult for you to move forward with the woman or man of your dreams. When you do not take in the idea of what you want and what you seek, you will never be happy.

For several people, family is such an important part in life because it is filled with your loved ones and those you really care for. Without family, many believe you don’t have anything, especially because it signifies so much; support system, love, laughter, strong wiliness, structure and much more. So the opinion of those close to you (family or friends) tends to matter more than your own.

There is nothing wrong with evaluating the opinion of others in your life especially when they are seeking your best interest but be cognizant and don’t forget what makes you happy. Balance is the strong objective when combining marriage and those who love you (family and friends.) To love both parties at an equal level may be challenging times but it is the best way to keep great relationships with those who mean the most to you.

True Love can be Hard to Come By

Posted on: June 6th, 2013 by Executive Matchmaker Romella Battle

Have you ever asked yourself why people search high and low for the dedicated, genuine, long term kind of love? For those who are looking for a long term commitment and relationship, dating is only a step within the process of finding the person who compliments them. No one really wants to spend their life dating without progress being made; the difference between treating dating as a game and a serious notion.

Once the idea and object of dating is taking seriously, love can be found but it can also slip out of your hands before you know it. On occasion, when a person finds the specific kind of love they’re looking for, why does it seem to slip away too easy? Actions like this may occur if a couple is together for a while and the excitement or passion that once burned deeply in the relationship , is not as strong as it once was. The relationship filled with strong will and fight for love seems more like a battlefield between two people disputing over different emotions, opinions and values; failure within a relationship.

As a relationship turns to turmoil more than likely it is the lack of working together as one or an uproar of neglect. Neglect can be one of the most poisonous objects to hit a relationship because it can happen without a person realizing it. Studies have shown high levels of neglect within married couples which leads to higher divorce rates. Most of the time neglect is inflicted by the male figure or the least emotional person within the relationship and sometimes the person does not even realize what they are doing until it is too late. This is why it’s not only important to solidify your love for one another but also being cognizant of the actions taking place throughout the relationship is key.

For some, finding a good thing in their mate can be a challenge and time consuming, so why neglect and treat them poorly?

-C.Johnson

A Challenge to Your Intellect

Posted on: June 4th, 2013 by Executive Matchmaker Romella Battle

If a person you are considering dating is drop dead gorgeous but had no intellect would that matter. Would beauty ultimately win over brains

When dating someone, one of the key factors or first things a person may notice is the physical attributes of the individual they are interested in. It could be a pretty face, thin waist with hips and legs to match or a clean cut, tough body and well groomed man who takes the cake but is it the physical beauty the only thing sending you over the edge?

Statistics have shown that the physicality of a person has played a significant role for individuals when dating or looking for a significant other. Additional factors such as employment, goals in life, lifestyle, background, etc. are also other characteristics people look into but for many, the outer appearance still wins.

Usually a person’s outer beauty influences a portion of what people look for in their significant other but how much influence does it entail. Is it the physical attraction that plays such a important role when dating someone that people are blind-sided by their true character?

Has society become so shallow that it has influenced us to choose our partners solely based on looks? Personal self-esteem issues or the idea of not having someone look the par on your arm has become a major issue for some people. Setting standards when looking for a significant other is vital when dating but do you continuously choose beauty over the true character of a person?

-C. Johnson

What Does Your Bestfriend Mean to You?

Posted on: June 1st, 2013 by Executive Matchmaker Romella Battle

There is nothing like a close friend or best friend, especially when they are of the opposite sex; kind of gives you the best of both worlds.

Your best friend is a person who knows your ins and outs, what makes you click, likes and dislikes and most importantly a person you confide in. When your BFF is of the opposite sex, does it complicate certain things or does it make them easier? Sure you have the best of both worlds and you are able to get the inside scoop on how guys truly feel or what women really think but do tables begin to turn when the idea of relationship is at hand.

When it comes to dating a close friend it can be a sensitive subject. More than likely the history shared between the two parties is so special and significant, the risk of damaging the strong bond may not be worth it. Rather people know it or not, crossing paths from friends to lovers is complicated. The action itself can jumble the concept, details and obligations set forth in a friendship which can lead to chaos and disruption. In friendship a bond is continuously growing but when paths cross and roles make a significant change, more than likely the friendship you once knew or had, no longer exists.

On the higher end of things, the role reversal is not always a bad thing and this suffices when the connection and bond shared between the two people is strong and genuine. At times this will allow the relationship as boyfriend and girlfriend, husband and wife or dating, grown immensely. The downfall of this situation occurs when you believe you knew that person in and out but once the line is crossed and dating is involved, you discover certain things that are opposite of what “you knew.” If things begin to spiral downhill you not only lost a potential mate but you have lost your friend as well and all of the bonding and significant history that you two have built may not appear as clear as it once was before.

A true friendship can hold a significant amount of weight rather it is someone of the opposite sex or not, it’s genuine. Value the bond and connection that you may share, let it grow and progress.

-C.Johnson

Lack of Emotional Intimacy

Posted on: May 29th, 2013 by Executive Matchmaker Romella Battle

Where does your emotional intimacy lie?

Emotional intimacy has been crowned as one of the key factors to a successful relationship.

This method takes place when the levels of communication and trust are in sync with one another, which can be seen as a positive or negative. When distributed correctly, the result of great emotional intimacy brings a realm of bliss to a relationship. The lack of emotional intimacy can lead to the destruction and failure of a relationship and this is because, the couple are not on the same level and willing to work together.

Majority of the time, emotional intimacy is confused with physical intimacy (physicality) which brings forth a lot of miscommunication and false interpretation in a relationship. Naturally people can confuse the two by connecting the idea of sharing something personal between two people. The confusion leads to the gateway of failure and lack of one or the other i.e. high divorce rates, uncommitted relationships, lack of trust, etc.

Though it is different, physical attraction and physical intimacy are important factors within a romantic relationship as well but sometimes it overshadows the importance of emotional intimacy. Yes the physical aspect in a relationship is key but a lack of emotion will truly leave a bond high and dry.

When a relationship represents extensive levels of communication, love, loyalty, trust and understanding allows a couple to contribute to their most special feelings with one another; building their different levels of intimacy rather it is physical or emotional.

Believe it or not to be emotional connection with someone takes a lot. You have to be secure within yourself and be in tune with the emotions, thoughts, flaws and all because without it, a connection with someone else is almost impossible. By doing this, it will bring you to a level where you are able to share and connect with your significant other all by building your emotional levels of intimacy.

-C.Johnson

To Date or Not To Date?

Posted on: May 24th, 2013 by Executive Matchmaker Romella Battle

Statistics have shown a number increase of children from single parent homes, acting out when they are introduced to a person their parent is dating. One of the conflicts arises when a parent is approached about their child when asking the opinion from the person they are seeing. The main question will surely come up; as a single parent, when dating someone who does not appear to get along with your child, do you continue seeing them or do you stop the relationship in its tracks?

Children, who are a part of a divorce or in a single parent home try adapting to major changes that are not in their control. While their mother or father is all they know, at times, a sense of intimidation, scariness and neglect begin to swarm their child’s mind, causing them to misbehave or “act out.” This defense mechanism puts them in a higher stance, knowing their mother or father will come to the rescue and fix whatever the problem is. This is why a lot of single parents are nervous or even skeptical when dating again. A major portion relies on how the child views the significant other of the parent because the first impression is usually a vital factor.

Dating can be very exciting and stressful all at the same time but if you take your time and know what you are getting into, things will fall into place. For single parents with children, there is nothing wrong with dating and finding that special spark again but when involving your children, strategize and plan. When things are planned and mapped out, the worries of your significant other liking your child and your child liking them, becomes slim to none.

-C.Johnson